Here I am another week and not much progress. I am trying so hard but have had so many setbacks. I have started working with a personal trainer and I am so happy with that choice. He keeps me accountable for my actions. And this journey is not just a physical one its also a mental one. I believe it is more mental than physical. I have always felt negative torwards myself for as long as I can remember and have had situations in my life that have profoundly effected me mentally. I am working on both now. Food has always been my go to comforter. I am working on a routine for myself to help in this area! As this week has went I let my routine go. The gym was no longer a priority as well as a few other key points of my routine. So am I really working on myself? Yes but I have so much more to work on.
This morning I woke up with the determination to get back in the gym. So I do I was off to the gym at 7:30am as Shane took the kids to school. I did my workout that was in my training folder. I finished and it was around 8:20am and I felt like I could do more. So I went to the park and walked a mile. I went home went through my routine. Like any other day or my goal day. I asked Shane to take me to work this morning. As I was about to turn in and received a phone call that rocked my world. Now I am an hour from home sitting in a waiting room. So this wasn't really a normal day. And I am unsure of the near future. But I do know that when I walk back in the door whenever that will be tonight. The morning routine will effect my evening. I have my workout in and other things taken care of. And I can lay down in bed knowing I put my health at the near top of my priority list. I may take five years to reach my goal but I get there. (According to my trainer it will be much sooner than five years). I can and will do this!!! Sorry if this is all over the place!!
Thursday, May 21, 2015
Sunday, April 19, 2015
Getting back up!!!
Wow its been since August 17th I have wrote a blog. I wish I could say I have lost a great amount of weight but that hasn't happened. I wish I could say I have stuck with the eating healthy but I haven't. I wish I could say I have kept up with the fitness but I haven't. I haven't failed I have just struggled.
I came to the conclusion about a month and a half ago I have to love myself the way I am now to love myself 100lbs smaller. So that's where I am at now learning loving myself and taking care of Stacy. I have always put my self last especially in the last 5 years. I am there to help everyone and everything but wasn't helping the most important person. My spiritual life had taken the back seat too. So last month I decided to do something for myself weekly. I have had a massage, my hair done, a weekend away, and a day of just relaxing. I am no longer sporting the yoga pants, no make up, and ponytail look. ( there will be no pony tails in my future for sure as my hair is too short for it). Don't be alarmed my husband and kids are still getting plenty of mom attention. We had a fun evening at the park playing baseball. As a family with a preteen and 2 teens we don't always agree on stuff like this. Spiritually I am working on getting back to where I need to be. I am where God wants me to be church wise and that has been a struggle for a few years but I am back home.
In February I was browsing Facebook and came upon an event that was scheduled to happen in my community and there was an essay contest to win the Title of Henry County Sweetheart. It was the night before the deadline I was like I have nothing to lose and I wrote an essay. Not thinking much about it more the next week I got the call. I won!!!! I won a tool box of some neat things to help my weight loss journey. It was very overwhelming.
One thing I won was a membership to Anytime fitness and began to use it almost immediately. I still am working on the motivation part and getting in there but its coming. I am trying to become a regular in Zumba class which is a struggle. I am so glad it is getting warmer I love walking at the park and the trail. I checked out a new trail last night but I am iffy about it. I just need to get in a routine and it is tough.
I have come to realize I have an addiction to food and have no clue how to control my food intake. I have actually looked into over eater's anonymous. Wishing they had a support group local and they don't. But I do have their steps wrote down so I am beginning there. This is a real struggle and I know I am not the only one that deals with it. Actually I have kept it very secretive but I am putting it out there today.
I am doing this as a forever change not a quick fix. If it takes me two years than it will be two years but I will never see this weight again. It will be a complete lifestyle change. I need so much support to keep going. I have some amazing people in my life that have been that to me even when I fell off the wagon. I am forever thankful for that!!!
I came to the conclusion about a month and a half ago I have to love myself the way I am now to love myself 100lbs smaller. So that's where I am at now learning loving myself and taking care of Stacy. I have always put my self last especially in the last 5 years. I am there to help everyone and everything but wasn't helping the most important person. My spiritual life had taken the back seat too. So last month I decided to do something for myself weekly. I have had a massage, my hair done, a weekend away, and a day of just relaxing. I am no longer sporting the yoga pants, no make up, and ponytail look. ( there will be no pony tails in my future for sure as my hair is too short for it). Don't be alarmed my husband and kids are still getting plenty of mom attention. We had a fun evening at the park playing baseball. As a family with a preteen and 2 teens we don't always agree on stuff like this. Spiritually I am working on getting back to where I need to be. I am where God wants me to be church wise and that has been a struggle for a few years but I am back home.
In February I was browsing Facebook and came upon an event that was scheduled to happen in my community and there was an essay contest to win the Title of Henry County Sweetheart. It was the night before the deadline I was like I have nothing to lose and I wrote an essay. Not thinking much about it more the next week I got the call. I won!!!! I won a tool box of some neat things to help my weight loss journey. It was very overwhelming.
One thing I won was a membership to Anytime fitness and began to use it almost immediately. I still am working on the motivation part and getting in there but its coming. I am trying to become a regular in Zumba class which is a struggle. I am so glad it is getting warmer I love walking at the park and the trail. I checked out a new trail last night but I am iffy about it. I just need to get in a routine and it is tough.
I have come to realize I have an addiction to food and have no clue how to control my food intake. I have actually looked into over eater's anonymous. Wishing they had a support group local and they don't. But I do have their steps wrote down so I am beginning there. This is a real struggle and I know I am not the only one that deals with it. Actually I have kept it very secretive but I am putting it out there today.
I am doing this as a forever change not a quick fix. If it takes me two years than it will be two years but I will never see this weight again. It will be a complete lifestyle change. I need so much support to keep going. I have some amazing people in my life that have been that to me even when I fell off the wagon. I am forever thankful for that!!!
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